Weddings, Roadblocks, and Snapping Turtles

Highlights of Taylor Hunt and Elizabeth Floyd’s Wedding August 6, 2005, by the groom’s Aunt
to see pictures that go with this narrative, go to www.hessfamily.shutterfly.com

Thursday

We landed in Tallahassee(TLH) a town I can’t spell, and thus for a long time could make no travel arrangements to go to, as it did not exist in my spelling in any of the travel search engines, not to mention the airlines. Picked up rental car and drove one hour north, careful to avoid speed traps (per Judge Floyd) in Havana. We saw many gun shops and interesting bumper stickers and the red neck jokes were flying in the front seat (I was in the back) until we came upon a road block. As we slowed down to meet the troopers, Joe speculated that they were looking for a fugitive….and he was right. An armed bank robber, over six feet tall…and black….The Trooper told us that if we saw him running along the road NOT to stop, but to use our cell phones and call 911. So we had our first Georgia experience and we weren’t even there yet.

The Jamison Inn, where the wedding party commanded all 60 rooms, was charming, two two story buildings with a parking lot in between. A perfect party site, as you saw others coming and going (and late at night some of the guests got a standing ovation upon retiring for the evening.) Fortunately my sister had the youngers all in one building with the hospitality suite, which was staffed by Jon and his cousin Casey. (She thought they went through 38 cases of beer….I think she was short by about 12).

Our first activity was a caravan out into the countryside into the sunset to a log cabin restaurant called The Pond. Spanish moss, swamps, dirt roads---we loved the atomosphere, even though the lead car got lost. Some of the best fish ever, enhanced by the coolers of wine we imported from the Hospitality Suite (HS).

Friday morning we were up bright and early heading back to that city I can’t spell to meet Mary and Dave and Andrew at the airport, as they came in on a red eye. We were at a stop light close to the airport when I spied a pickup with a big garbage can shaking and rattling in the back—suddenly I spied a snake head as big as my forearm emerge from the can and realized that it came with flippers and a shell—the world’s largest snapping turtle almost landed on the hood of the car. My second Georgia experience, in Florida.

Racing back to the Jamison, we missed the bridesmaid luncheon party who had departed without us. Jon, being hospitable, handed us a cooler with cold water and a giant Bloody Mary as we turned the car around and drove back to TLH. Ever fearful of Havana, we stopped and poured out the drink before we could be speed trapped with an open container.

The luncheon was divine. Remember this menu for future ladies events: margaritas to start. Shrimp and rice salad, herbed green beans, and local tomatoes with homemade mayonnaise. Frothy meringue with Georgia peaches and whipped cream. My third Georgia experience, in Florida.
Have I mentioned that it rained—a lot. This is significant because Andrew spent much of the afternoon at the Jamison wading in the puddles and enjoying the rain, as he never sees rain in San Diego. The wedding party had to go to the rehearsal, but the grandmothers pulled rank and decided they knew how to walk down the aisle. So Mom rode with us to the rehearsal dinner, at the local country club.

The dinner, for 180 plus people, was to die for. The tables were decorated with giant bronze urns containing ivy and blue and white flowers, while the tables were covered with taffeta in chocolate and ice blue. Tables were named for Texas or Georgia towns—ours was Denison. Napkins were wrapped in bandanas commemorating the event, and western picture frames contained place cards. The roast after the dinner was only a little bit over the line, and the part about the Highland Park Flasher was declared Not True.

Taylor gave Elizabeth beautiful earrings as her wedding present. (She gave him a watch, on the day of the wedding.) The room was extended with a tent, actually the town of Bainbridge was extended throughout—the servers included the high school drill team. We understood that the bride’s mother had actually had city crews out trimming the grass by the side of the road. All that effort paid off, as Bainbridge sparkled, and the country club Will Never Be the Same—it exceeded expectations by far. We would go so far as to call it the Perfect Wedding. What made it most special, however, was the friendliness of Elizabeth’s family, their welcome to all of us, and her Mom’s serenity throughout. They seemed to enjoy the events as much as we all did. Of course, Carol can no longer be simply a champion tennis player. She is now the Wedding Planner of Bainbridge. All of those cute drill team members who served at the rehearsal dinner and the reception will be calling on her in years to come to help out. In fact, I have heard rumors that she will be called upon to consult in Dallas, business she will not turn down, as she can visit E and T. But I don’t think she can get the grass trimmed in Dallas!

The HS after the Rehearsal Dinner resembled, I was told, a UGA frat party. The groomsmen and ushers were staying at a motel next door, and most of them arrived Friday evening. Word spread about the quantity of beer, and the weather cleared so that the parking lot became the Place to Be. Note that the HS had been replenished overnight because the Thursday night pre-party had cleaned it out. This after-party lasted until about 5 am. My son began to notice that there was a serious shortage of young ladies at this event, since most of the bridesmaids were engaged. Fortunately, us olders were staying in the building across the way, and we slept well under the air conditioning.

Saturday morning was the Sip and See. Also known as a brunch at the bridal family’s neighbors, followed by a viewing of her wedding gifts. Southern hospitality was on full display, and the food was really wonderful. Ham n Biscuits. Eggs. Mmmmm….The houses were in a piney woods, very serene and elegant. I was ready to move to Georgia. However, as we were leaving word was passed that the heavens were about to open up, and they did. It cooled things off. At some point Doug left to replenish the HS, and we were all on hand at the Suite to help unload the SUV when he arrived some hours later.

I should mention here that most of the provisions came from the WalMart across the road from the Jamison, but that Hard Liquor had to be procured from a Shady part of town. Joe and Jon both love Wal Mart, and have fond memories of the ones in Lexington, VA, Maui, and the Big Island. Joe forgot his dress shirt and bought a tacky but useful one in this Walmart. He alleged he was sorry he had packed, as he could have outfitted himself entirely. This after I made them both buy new suits for the event. By the way, they noticed that no one else had on a striped suit. I tried to convince them that California styles are avant garde but I am not sure they bought it. Jon did state, rather emphatically, that he will never have to shop for a wedding again. He’s done.

While Margaret and my Mom had their hair done that afternoon, we repaired to the local Dairy Queen. Joe was disappointed to find that they don’t serve steak fingers any more. I wisely abstained and read the local paper, which reported that the fugitive had been captured at 5 am the previous day, just as the Judge had predicted: a night in the swamps of southwest Georgia made jail seem good.

I knew someone knew something I didn’t know when one of the Dallas friends asked when they would open the church to allow us in. Have I mentioned that I felt so at home at this wedding because I knew so many of Margaret’s friends, either from Round Top excursions, or from Sea Island summers? If this friend had not every so casually clued me in I would have arrived 15 minutes before the wedding and found myself without a seat. Except that Margaret did tell us to say to the usher to seat us “between the ribbons”. This message did not get passed to all of the family, so at the church I reassured Doug’s siblings that they too belonged “between the ribbons”. I began to get worried that we wouldn’t leave room for the bridal party but it all worked out.

Taylor was the happiest bridegroom any of us had ever seen. He must have figured out what a GREAT DEAL he was getting in his lovely bride, or so his brother Austin said. I hear Austin would like an Elizabeth clone. The wedding was beautiful, the singing by Megan and Davin particularly so, and only one person fainted, and she later recovered. Let it be reported that the groom’s mother did Not cry. I think she was just relieved to see Taylor happy. One down, four to go.

On to the reception, at the same Bainbridge Country Club, transformed into a white rose garden. How could they top the dinner from the previous evening? They did. Passed fried oysters and crab claws. Multiple food stations with beef tenderloin, shrimp, pasta—some of the food I never even got to sample. An entire station of pralines being made in copper pans on the spot. A band from Atlanta that combined beach music and Sammy Davis, Jr. Great dancing. A groom’s cake in the shape of Texas and Georgia. Taylor’s Hunt grandparents “cutting a rug”. Even the flower girl danced. And finally two hands waving out the limo window as they left for Atlanta and a Maui honeymoon.

Jon left a little early with Mary and Dave, who had to relieve the sitter. (Andrew fell in love with his babysitters and his cousin Megan—the standard has been set) Jon had to ice down another half dozen cases of beer. Note to self: Georgia and Texas folks drink Bud Light and Miller Light. Beer in bottles did not go well—one young lady asked if it had alcohol in it. It must have been a fine evening. Jon kept hiding the chips so they wouldn’t get ground into the carpet. I kept pulling them out and serving them in the parking lot to the youngers, to add some carbs to the alcohol. Multicolored goldfish were especially popular.

We retired to our air conditioned room around 2 am because we knew the party was not over. The grandmothers hosted a brunch the next morning at a lovely lakeview home. Again the food was very southern—we loved the various homemade preserves and breads. Andrew attended in his seersucker Eaton suit. He immediately twisted off a brass button, but greatly enjoyed the strawberries. He was a Prince. All in attendance agreed that it had been an Exceptionally Wonderful Wedding.

We departed to help Doug and Jon dismantle the HS. Jon admitted it was masterful of moi to pass the carbs out in the parking lot, as the mess was not as great as other mornings. Austin managed to get three coolers loaded with booze into his SUV, Doug had all nineteen tuxes to return, Margaret had Mom, Dave and Mary had Andrew and a DVD player for the car, and we had Jon as a driver, until he confessed he had been up until 5 am. And the caravan began to Sea Island, which is a story for another time.